NO CHANGE OUT OF £31-15s-2d

LYMM  14   VALE OF LUNE  7
NORTH TWO WEST

The day began badly for the 'Alies'. There was no Daily Telegraph crossword to attempt and the Sun was clamped tightly by Brian as he studied form. Relief eventually came in the form of an Old Money Quiz kindly distributed by the Membership Secretary; at last something to test the little grey cells.

Some thought he should have been checking on fully paid up members ahead of the EGM instead of indulging in this trip, or was it a stagger dowm memory / penny lane. A certain amount of cribbing went on and arguing in the attempts to unravel the obscure clues. A former top banker and Cold War Warrior, struggled with 'half a garment of ladies underwear,' a leading North West electrician pondered on 'a wheeled mode of transport,' and what the hell did 'Venus, Mars and Neptune' mean.

No wonder the Alies reeled off the coach at 'Beechwood'. They were so befuddled they appointed Cumpst kitty master; bye bye the whip. hello fruit machine! However, there was no time to dip into the kitty because President Neil had set up a rake of pints, in addition to a bubbling black cauldron of soup. Soon a session was in full swing, it's like that at Lymm you know, which ended with a mad stampede down the stairs just in time for kick off.

Lymm flew down the slope on a misty damp afternoon, determined to put behind them the defeat at Whitchurch which presented LSH with the championship. They pummelled away at the Vale, not quite a rumble in the jungle, but an opening barrage that any heavyweight would have been proud of.
They went high, they went low, they dragged their opponents from one side of the twenty two to the other, but the Vale parried all their efforts despite being on the ropes. After going through a full repertoire Lymm went back to basics for their opening score after thirteen minutes. It was an old fashioned one, two, three and over. Number eight, Andy Williamson picked up at the base of a five metre scrum, scrum half Chris Kinsey flipped the ball to centre Adam Fletcher, for a crisp try converted by Nick Shaw.

Vale struggled to make it over half way, their tackling was first class and they managed to hang on until the thirty second minute. Again there was a level of directness and efficiency surrounding hooker Nick Girdlestone's try. Nick Shaw made the break from close range to set up the score, and then added the conversion.
With three minutes remaining the Vale roared deep into Lymm territory for the first time. Flushed with success they charged over virgin earth to register a well worked try. Dan Perry reached higher than everyone at a line out, Ashley Bolsover whipped out an accurate pass and suddenly James Bryan was bounding through a huge gap for a try converted by Andy Garnett.

The second half followed a similar pattern, with both defences as tight as Nora Batty's corsets. Lymm had the majority of possession but were unable to break down a resilient Vale defence that hardly missed a beat, even though Ian Bird limped off early in the half. Late in the game the Vale made a spirited attempt to share the points with a series of attacks that ruffled a few feathers enough to cause referee Simon MacKeen to issue a couple of yellow cards.

Vale's tackling was put under the microscope but they stood up well. Andy Garnett set the standard early on, Danny Lin, Luke Ford and James Knox were always in the thick of the action but all the squad made major contributions at critical times. Teenager Ashley Bolsover, making his first start, was full of youthful exuberance and even though he faced an experienced campaigner in the number nine shirt, he emerged from a testing encounter with credit.

Lymm had plenty to celebrate in a busy clubhouse. Not only did they record their first league 'double' over the Vale but one of their favourite young sons, David Strettle, scored England's only try at Croke Park on his debut. The roar almost lifted the beams out of their mountings, a team photograph crashed to the floor; there were cheers and tears following his score but it did not save England from a stuffing.

For those that had not lost the will to live in the excitement generated by the Old Money Quiz, the answer to the Venus, Mars and Neptune question was, wait for it, three far things, and the total from all the answers appears in the title of this report. Next subject for the Carlisle fixture will be avoirdupois which should weigh heavy on the mind!
Come back Steve Vose

VALE OF LUNE: A.Miller, J.Bryan, A.Garnett, I.Bird (Rep R.Thorn 45), J.Curran, N.Bennetts, A.Bolsover, P.Jackson, D.Schuyler (Rep G.Barton 58), D.Halliwell (Rep A.Cowey 58), D.Perry, J.Knox, L.Ford, D.Lin, M.Fowler.